If you’ve followed any celebrity divorces over the last 30 years, you’ve probably caught a glimpse of Laura Wasser’s career.
We know Wasser, a divorce lawyer at Cooperman & Mandles, from his defense of Kim Kardashian, Britney Spears and Ariana Grande.
Celebrity divorces aren’t much different from civil divorces, he says.
“I always say divorce is the great equalizer,” Wasser says. “People experience the same fear and pain whether they are famous or not.”
ACCORDING TO WASSER, THE NUMBER 1 REASON PEOPLE GET FOR DIVORCE
It’s the same most common reason why people choose to dissolve their relationships, whether famous or not. “The reason people divorce is because they can’t communicate,” Wasser says.
This problem may manifest as extramarital affairs or unhealthy drinking habits, for example, but the inability to communicate is often the root of the problem.
Prioritize ‘non-super sexy’ conversations before marriage
Many partners who choose to marry do not experience long-term discomfort. “Because when things are going well you don’t develop communication tools, and when things aren’t going well you don’t have the ability or resources to discuss them,” he says.
There are a lot of “super unsexy” conversations couples need to have before getting married, she says.
Is it important to send our children to private school? Do you mind if my parents live with us in their old age? These conversations aren’t fun, but they can save you money and heartache if the two of you aren’t aligned.
People’s needs may also change during marriage; Good communication is very important in this situation. “It’s hard to say, ‘I’m getting older and I don’t feel as attractive anymore,'” Wasser says. However, if your partner does not know how you feel, it is inevitable that he will not be able to meet your needs and you will be unhappy.
“Resentment builds, and you spend your energy elsewhere,” says Wasser.
By having difficult conversations before or early in marriage, you can develop healthy communication habits that will better serve you and your spouse.