Then the whispers are endless Diana Spencer with Prince Charles; Keanu Reeves and Alexandra Grant and all the lovers, old and new, who could never fit together… They were always subjected to ‘not to be considered inappropriate’ Before discussing your situation; How about remembering the iconic names that we are happy about as if we had met ourselves and that provide a 100% match for everyone?
Article: Simay Engür
From the movie Star Wars as an interstellar love Princess Leia and Han Solo, Mr. & Mrs., who would later officially reach the status of ‘dream couple’. John and Jane from the movie Smith, Asya and İlyas from Selvi Boylum Al Yazılım, Paul Varjak and Holly Golightly, who brought an iconic fire to our hearts with the movie Breakfast at Tiffany…
All these couples still make our hearts green as imaginary characters that we associate with in high doses.. Well, let’s say some facts, shall we? Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom, Hailey Baldwin and Justin Bieber, Gigi Hadid and Zayn Malik, Barack and Michelle Obama… Finally, can we add Melania Trump and Donald Trump, two of the rarest lovers, to the top of our list? We guess that there is a huge question mark in your mind. Now let’s reinforce the topic with one sentence: Total ‘keanu-ing’ they did!
WHAT IS KEANU-ING?
Yes, they did because ‘keanu-ing’ We can’t decide whether it was Donald or Melania… Keanu-ing is a relationship term that, according to others, means ‘being with someone who does not suit you’ and is named after the actor Keanu Reeves. Since Keanu Reeves and his girlfriend Alexandra Grant appeared on the red carpet together exactly two years ago; It has been criticized that Alexandra Grant looks older than Reeves. In this aspect It is also possible to say that we are talking about a very sexist relationship term! So, we give you a phrase that you can mostly use in a sentence when you imagine the pairs that you cannot fit one with the other as two odd ones: He did a complete keanu-ing! The real question is this: Why do we try to equalize couples in terms of age, unfortunately social status, unfortunately race, and unfortunately physically, and when they don’t appeal to our taste, we make them the subject of gossip tables? I ask you, O Queen of lynchings, confess! Have you never been keanu-ing?
“THEY DON’T MATCH AT ALL”
It starts with ‘Look, the bride with squinted eyes has cast her eyes over the horse’s abandonment, her waist is wrapped in purple robes, like pure wood.’ ‘Don’t Take Him, Take Me’ With his song, he added the most striking keanu-ing example to Turkish music. Sezen Aksu.
Bihter and Adnan are Halit Ziya Uşaklıgil’s keanu-ing examples in Turkish literature and later in television, which kept a generation glued to the screen. Well, even if it is true; Why do we claim that couples are not suitable for each other and we enjoy talking about it, even though it’s none of our business?
Psychologist Cansu Yurtseven says that each of us has different partner criteria due to social teachings, family and environmental observation. These criteria act as a filter, highlighting appearance for some people, and power, status or financial means for others. These criteria, which are already ingrained in your mind, eliminate those that do not fit your priority list and separate and keep those in the first place. For this reason, we cannot understand from the outside what the priorities and needs of partners are when choosing each other. We criticize couples according to our own filter, and since no one’s criteria match each other, we turn into a giant judging machine. This mechanism, which also brings gossip, becomes enjoyable after a while!
Psychologist Cansu Yurtseven continues her words as follows: “Every person is unique and it is necessary to evaluate him individually, on his own terms and standards. We all have different wishes, dreams, expectations and needs. Some of us need power, some need status, some need visuality, some need materiality, and some need attention, love, compassion and loyalty. Even though we sometimes need all of these, one of them becomes the most important need. Therefore, for example, when we deeply feel care, love, compassion and loyalty; other criteria remain unimportant. While we continue our lives like a happy, peaceful child whose needs are met; People look at our lives from a distance, with a list of criteria at hand, and discourses of incompatibility emerge. Others who cannot define my unique, special needs evaluate me and my relationship within the framework of their own needs.”
In short, Melania Trump’s filter may be holding surf-wavy blonde hair, and Donald Trump’s filter may be loving eyes that always look at him with disgust… If we look at the filter of Keanu Reeves, the originator of the term, who has been criticized for Keanu-ing, it seems that ‘intelligent, self-sufficient and intellectual’ are among the key criteria. You see, it is more fun to guess the couples’ filtering criteria than to say ‘they don’t match at all’!
NO, I WAS KEANU-ING!
Come on now, all hands in the air… Well, have you never been with someone who you thought did not meet both the criteria of those around you and your own criteria? Çağla, 33, who lives in America, admits that at the beginning of their relationship, she thought she was not compatible with her boyfriend, Alex, because of his political views. However, due to his previous bad relationship experience, he lists his new criteria as sincere, pleasant conversational and kind. That being the case, Alex passes the test!
Advertiser living in Istanbul, 28-year-old Deniz He said that his girlfriend had no physical type; However, by saying that he feels safe around him and that he can be himself, he explains the key words in his filter. Moreover, it is possible to say that both women were criticized by those around them because of the negative characteristics they saw in their lovers. Think about it… In those moments when you were accused of Keanu-ing, did you evaluate your relationship through your own filter or through the criteria of others? Your answer reveals how well you know yourself! Those who fight illegally about relationships are a completely different matter… Just their friends, family; or if he is a public figure, we are talking about those who are accused of keanu-ing by all other people and therefore hide their lover.
We ask an expert what consequences can occur when potential keanu-ing victims hide their relationships and Expert Psychologist Arzu Beyribey He responds as follows: “An individual who hides his relationship from those around him because he receives criticism means that he is not ready to protect this relationship within himself. This choice will bring distrust and unrest in the relationship. If there is a real incompatibility between couples, as in this saying, ‘The head pillow is not the same’, which refers to the imbalance between couples, time will reveal it. “In addition, a person who hides his relationship because his environment will react will make the other person feel like he is a prisoner and does not belong to the relationship,” he says, adding that the need to belong is very important; He adds that this is only possible by being loved, being able to cooperate with his environment and sharing.
Naturally, if the person accused of keanu-ing hides their relationship, their partner feels excluded by their environment and conflicts arise in their relationship. Considering all this, if you are in a relationship in which you are truly confident, rather than hiding it; ‘yes, I’m keanu-ing’ with all your might; It is very important to be able to say ‘but this depends on your criteria…’. And yes, this even applies to men or women accused of being gold diggers! Because their filter holds tight money and high standard of living. Thank you Neo for shaking up all the gossipy Whatsapp groups! Sorry, Keanu Reeves…
ALEXANDRA GRANT – KEANU REEVES
WE SUIT IT, BUT?
How can you reexamine your relationship if you are told that your partner is not a good fit for you due to physical appearance, lifestyle or age difference and you are accused of ‘keanu-ing’? Psychologist Cansu Yurtseven answers. “If your partner is excluded by your social circle and you are constantly exposed to negative criticism, you may sometimes feel ashamed of your partner. But this basically means running away from your truth and self; Because your choice of partner in emotional relationships contains parts of you. You might think: ‘He’s not just an individual; It is my individual choice, reflections of me and my past. Therefore, whether I hide or question him has more to do with me than him. Because I chose him and brought him into my life. Now I continue this relationship.’ In short, when making an evaluation, you should try to examine yourself, your own invisible processes and criteria.”