Kelly Clarkson shared that her divorce from Brandon Blackstock was much harder than she thought.
“Just to be brutally honest, I didn’t get it done [the divorce] The “Stronger” singer told Zane Lowe in an interview with Apple Music on Wednesday.
“I don’t know how people got through something like this because I won’t say I did it gracefully. I wasn’t alone behind closed doors.”
Clarkson, who filed for divorce in June 2020 after nearly seven years of marriage, recalled that even before they officially separated, she cried “so much” that she “couldn’t even speak.”
She shared that she added to her sadness by blaming her “unhealthy habits” during their marriage for this.
Clarkson, 41, did not name Blackstock directly, but said the habits she learned from her religious upbringing sometimes led her to put someone else’s needs above her own.
“That didn’t serve me all that well in a relationship,” she said, adding, “There were a lot of unhealthy habits you now recognize, or habits you realize you didn’t see before. Backtracking is so much easier.”
Talking more about his time with his former music manager, Clarkson said in an interview on June 13 that he’s stayed so long because his “ego” intervened in his “limiting” marriage to Blackstock, 46.
“When you’re in it… I’m like I can do this. I can deal with so many things. I can control my movements. I can control my reactions,” he said on the “We Can Do Hard Things” podcast.
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He also gave fans some insight into the turbulent partnership on his latest album, “Chemistry,” by telling fans in March that the new music will cover all aspects of his marriage.
“This album is definitely the arc of an entire relationship… and an entire relationship shouldn’t be reduced to one thing. “So, you know, good and bad and ugly things happen in it,” Clarkson said in a video posted on Instagram.
Clarkson and Blackstock, who share a 9-year-old daughter, River Rose, and a 7-year-old son, Remington, went through a lengthy divorce that was ultimately settled in March 2022 after two years of court battles.
Back and forth it had a hefty price tag as her lawyers fought for custody of her children and their property.
In July 2021, the “American Idol” winner was ordered to pay her ex-husband approximately $200,000 per month in spousal and child support.
Additionally, Blackstock was ordered to pay legal fees amounting to $1.25 million.
Ultimately, Clarkson is given primary custody of her two children, while Blackstock, a Montana resident at the time, will give birth to the children one weekend a month.
The “Breakaway” singer was awarded a $10.4 million Montana ranch in 2021 after Blackstock, her former stepmother, Reba McEntyre, wanted the ranch to be shared equally between the two.
However, given that Clarkson was paying for the multi-million dollar property, the judge disagreed with Blackstock.