Developing healthy conflict resolution skills strengthens a resilient bond and creates a plan for resolving future conflicts.
7 TIPS FOR CONFLICT RESOLUTION BETWEEN COUPLES
Effective communication
Active listening is one of the best ways to find a solution to your conflict. When your partner talks about their problems, listen actively without formulating a response. Think about what is said before responding. Over time, you will experience less conflict because you will intuitively understand what your partner wants or how they feel.
Express your feelings immediately
Proper timing is crucial when dealing with marital conflict. Avoid bringing up issues when you are both stressed or angry, or they may escalate further.
On the other hand, don’t let problems pile up until a later date. Once you have both calmed down, it is advisable to address the issue directly and honestly. Also, clearly express your feelings, such as anger, frustration, or confusion, and then ask for a specific change. For example, “Next time I want you to let me choose where we go on vacation” or “I don’t like it when you yell at me.” Finally, “Don’t you agree?” Ask for confirmation such as.
Look for compromise
Remember, you are two people with different backgrounds and you will not agree on everything. Since conflict resolution is not about winning, compromise can work for both parties. Compromises ensure that individual concerns and needs are met while promoting a sense of fairness.
Avoid blaming your partner
Sometimes things get out of control, but blaming your partner puts them on the defensive. It’s not easy to keep your cool all the time, but using “I feel” statements often helps you put the other person in your shoes. For example” “I don’t feel valued when you treat me like this in front of your friends.” If your partner values you, they will understand how their behavior affects your relationship.
Create healthy boundaries
Announce your absolute no-nos as early as possible. Your partner should be aware from the beginning of what you cannot compromise on. But even if you haven’t mentioned them before or things have changed over the course of your relationship, let them know. Discuss “unromantic” things like budgeting, chores, family expectations, parenting, and more. Remember that personal space is vital and each person in a relationship should be free to pursue other hobbies and friendships.
Solve one problem at a time
Avoid discussions that start on one topic and branch off into multiple topics. Always agree with your partner to solve one problem before moving on to another. With practice and patience, each partner will have time to process their feelings before tackling another issue.
Don’t always think the worst about your partner
If your partner doesn’t respond to your text or is late for lunch, avoid jumping to negative conclusions. Don’t always assume they are malicious, especially if this behavior is not repeated. Instead of making accusations, ask your partner directly about the situation.
You can get professional help
If conflicts persist or escalate, a professional marriage counselor can provide valuable information and guidance. They can help both parties open up, identify underlying problems, and develop effective conflict resolution strategies.
Embracing conflicts rather than avoiding them can contribute to a resilient marriage relationship and personal growth.